Tonight’s devotional/Quick update

There are days when I’m too lazy to write my devotional response in my journal.. so thanks to technology, I can type it out. I also haven’t been able to update my blog in such a long time! As life gets busier here in Japan, I allow my daily tasks to take over and consume my time and energy. Moreover, I find that tasks, as spiritual as they may be, become a replacement for spending time with the Lord. This, in turn, tires me out even more because I am not feeding my soul with the living water and bread of God’s Word and time with Him. Yes, sleep and food are important (obvi), but if I’m just living off of my own strength, wisdom, and little motivation, how is that glorifying God? I need Him, and it’s very clear that my work is in vain when it is not by and for Him. Tonight’s devotional was on Ecclesiastes 1:14 (“Behold, all is vanity.”), and I’ve actually been reading Ecclesiastes on my own time. The great and prosperous King David writes about how he has tasted and experienced all the pleasures and luxuries of the world, but all his work, all his possessions were vanity. Chapter 6, verse 7 says: “All the toil of man is for his mouth, yet his appetite is not satisfied.” If you are a king and have everything a human could ever want, but still feel that it is not enough… shoot, I don’t know what is! It is God who gives us meaning, purpose, and fulfillment day by day. Yea, there are times like now when I forget or am not sure what my purpose is, but He shows me that living for tasks, accomplishment, my own happiness, etc.. it’s just not enough. I can be comfortable but still not be at peace. I know that God places this discomfort in me because only HE can be my peace, rest, joy, everything I could ever really want. Sure, I can eat a lot of snacks, go on the computer until 3 AM, buy some more cute striped shirts, but how long is that going to keep me satisfied? Is that going to really make me happy? Until when? And when I need to buy, eat, consume more… isn’t that an indication that my hunger for more cannot be satiated by things? even things that I really really really like/love? Thus, all these temporary pleasures are consumed in vain if they are not for the glory of my loving, patient, and just Father. He watches over me, and I’m sure it pains Him to see me value my comfort and little pleasures above the greatest and eternal comfort/pleasure/everything I need: God Himself. But I am bound by His love and promises. His truth. There is no other truth that has presented itself to me. There is no other happiness or meaning that I have found like that of the Lord’s. Thank God that He won’t let me go. Thank God that I feel His presence with me everywhere. Praise Him forever. How blessed I am.

Just a quick photo update of what’s been going on recently:

YUMM THANKSGIVING DINNERR

Another Thanksgiving party!! Our high school ministry :)

One of our stinter brothers made the sisters a BOMB DINNERRRR

PAD CEE YOU (I know this is the wrong spelling), twas SO good

heck YEA those are dark chocolate covered oranges

me and Harry Potter, he gave me his glasses!!!!

I would like to update more in detail, but it is late! I will definitely try and be more consistent with my updates, but it is getting BIZZAY. Thank you everyone for your prayers :) A newsletter (aka email update) will be going out soon as well. Preparations for Christmas are underway!

Matthew 10:25

“It is enough for the disciple that he be as his master.”

“No one will dispute this statement, for it would be unseemly for the servant to be exalted above his Master. When our Lord was on earth, what was the treatment he received? Were his claims acknowledged, his instructions followed, his perfections worshipped, by those whom he came to bless? No; “He was despised and rejected of men.” Outside the camp was his place: cross-bearing was his occupation. Did the world yield him solace and rest? “Foxes have holes, and the birds of the air have nests; but the Son of man hath not where to lay his head.” This inhospitable country afforded him no shelter: it cast him out and crucified him. Such—if you are a follower of Jesus, and maintain a consistent, Christ-like walk and conversation—you must expect to be the lot of that part of your spiritual life which, in its outward development, comes under the observation of men. They will treat it as they treated the Saviour—they will despise it. Dream not that worldlings will admire you, or that the more holy and the more Christ-like you are, the more peaceably people will act towards you. They prized not the polished gem, how should they value the jewel in the rough? “If they have called the Master of the house Beelzebub, how much more shall they call them of his household?” If we were more like Christ, we should be more hated by his enemies. It were a sad dishonour to a child of God to be the world’s favourite. It is a very ill omen to hear a wicked world clap its hands and shout “Well done” to the Christian man. He may begin to look to his character, and wonder whether he has not been doing wrong, when the unrighteous give him their approbation. Let us be true to our Master, and have no friendship with a blind and base world which scorns and rejects him. Far be it from us to seek a crown of honour where our Lord found a coronet of thorns.“

I was convicted and glad to read this paragraph yesterday evening. Especially as someone who finds joy in receiving approval and favor from people, I learned more about Christ’s life through Spurgeon’s words. He was not accepted by the world, nor did he, the perfect and righteous King of everything, have a home or place to rest his head. Jesus didn’t come to earth to be loved by all. He lived his life on earth to die and rise again for us and our Heavenly Father. Christ lived with an eternal perspective, but I realized that I fail to have this mindset. Something I still struggle with is living to be admired. The focus tends to be on me and my comfort instead of Christ, and that is not what God calls us to do. I pray that I will strive to live with an eternal perspective and not for the world as I am wont to do.

Before I go to sleep..

Some great words from Charles Spurgeon (tonight’s verse was 2 Chronicles 30:27 – “Then the priests and the Levites arose and blessed the people, and their voice was heard, and their prayer came to his holy habitation in heaven.”)

“Prayer is the never-failing resort of the Christian in any case, in every plight. When you cannot use your sword you may take to the weapon of all-prayer. Your powder may be damp, your bow-string may be relaxed, but the weapon of all-prayer need never be out of order. Leviathan laughs at the javelin, but he trembles at prayer. Sword and spear need furbishing, but prayer never rusts, and when we think it most blunt it cuts the best. Prayer is an open door which none can shut. Devils may surround you on all sides, but the way upward is always open, and as long as that road is unobstructed, you will not fall into the enemy’s hand. We can never be taken by blockade, escalade, mine, or storm, so long as heavenly succours can come down to us by Jacob’s ladder to relieve us in the time of our necessities. Prayer is never out of season: in summer and in winter its merchandize is precious. Prayer gains audience with heaven in the dead of night, in the midst of business, in the heat of noonday, in the shades of evening. In every condition, whether of poverty, or sickness, or obscurity, or slander, or doubt, your covenant God will welcome your prayer and answer it from His holy place. Nor is prayer ever futile. True prayer is evermore true power. You may not always get what you ask, but you shall always have your real wants supplied. When God does not answer His children according to the letter, He does so according to the spirit. If thou askest for coarse meal, wilt thou be angered because He gives thee the finest flour? If thou seekest bodily health, shouldst thou complain if instead thereof He makes thy sickness turn to the healing of spiritual maladies? Is it not better to have the cross sanctified than removed? This evening, my soul, forget not to offer thy petition and request, for the Lord is ready to grant thee thy desires.”

May this give you hope in all times. Know that prayer never fails because God never fails to listen. My favorite part is: “You may not always get what you ask, but you shall always have your real wants supplied.” How will we know what God supplies if we do not ask? furthermore, if we do not ask in faith? God has been answering all my prayers, and I may not necessarily get what I ask for per se.. but to expect that I will get what I want every time is selfish and foolish. God supplies me with my real wants, which is what I truly need. Why give something that lasts only temporarily? That is not true love. That’s like giving a toy that you know will break in 2 days to your child. You want to give something that will last forever and give that person real joy or make them a stronger, better person. Prayer always wins. Prayer is our strongest weapon. God, please help me see how important prayer is, and thank you for being you. Thank you for listening, and taking the time to give us what we truly want. I pray that we would not just ask for THINGS, but more of you in our lives. We don’t really want things from this world. The essence of everything that we are asking you for comes from you and IS you. Amen.

Oct. 17th, evening

Isaiah 40:11 – “He will tend his flock like a shepherd; he will gather the lambs in his arms; he will carry them in his bosom, and gently lead those that are young.”

Our good Shepherd has in His flock a variety of experiences, some are strong in the Lord, and others are weak in faith, but He is impartial in His care for all His sheep, and the weakest lamb is as dear to Him as the most advanced of the flock. Lambs are wont to lag behind, prone to wander, and apt to grow weary, but from all the danger of these infirmities the Shepherd protects them with His arm of power. He finds new-born souls, like young lambs, ready to perish—He nourishes them till life becomes vigorous; He finds weak minds ready to faint and die—He consoles them and renews their strength. All the little ones He gathers, for it is not the will of our heavenly Father that one of them should perish. What a quick eye He must have to see them all! What a tender heart to care for them all! What a far-reaching and potent arm, to gather them all! In His lifetime on earth He was a great gatherer of the weaker sort, and now that He dwells in heaven, His loving heart yearns towards the meek and contrite, the timid and feeble, the fearful and fainting here below. How gently did He gather me to Himself, to His truth, to His blood, to His love, to His church! With what effectual grace did He compel me to come to Himself! Since my first conversion, how frequently has He restored me from my wanderings, and once again folded me within the circle of His everlasting arm! The best of all is, that He does it all Himself personally, not delegating the task of love, but condescending Himself to rescue and preserve His most unworthy servant. How shall I love Him enough or serve Him worthily? I would fain make His name great unto the ends of the earth, but what can my feebleness do for Him? Great Shepherd, add to Thy mercies this one other, a heart to love Thee more truly as I ought.

- Charles Spurgeon

So many times I forget that we are like a flock of lambs. No matter how weak or strong we are individually in our faith, God sees us all the same. He does not favor one over the other. We have no right to compare ourselves with one another, seeing some as weaker or inferior to our level of faith. To even have this kind of mindset is to show our weakness and its abundance. Yet still, Christ condescended to our level and became human, loving us for the weak and lost sheep that we are. I can only hope that my heart grows more and more like Christ’s, seeing myself and others as sheep in the care of the strongest, most just, and most loving Father. I am not better or worse than my fellow sheep, and I should not care to rank myself or anyone, for that matter, among a group that are all sinful, weak, and broken. We are all loved by the same Father, and we all strive to love Him. Yes, we may be on different parts of our walks with God, some farther along than others while some have just gotten on that very path. Yet God rejoices for each sheep, and we are all baby lambs in His care.

Although I don’t

read the Bible as much as I’d like to admit, I looked at three passages that I had bookmarked with my teeny tiny Japanese post-its from missions in 2009. The two passages that really spoke wisdom and insight to me today were: Hebrews 10: 19-36 and Hebrews 12: 3-11.

It’s a lot to write, so I’m just going to write the verses that I feel were most poignant (am I using that word right…..).

“For if we go on sinning deliberately after receiving the knowledge of truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins, but a fearful expectation of judgment, and a fury of fire that will consume the adversaries.” … “But recall the former days when, after you were enlightened, you endured a hard struggle with sufferings, sometimes being publicly exposed to reproach and affliction, and something being partners with those so treated.” … “Therefore do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God you may receive what is promised.”

This first passage really spoke to me because there are so many times when I know I’m sinning, but I ignore God and His Spirit telling me to repent and seek Him. After avoiding God for a while, I start to feel guilty and more afraid of His judgment even though I know He knows all that I do and think and say. I begin to fear more than trust, resulting in a further avoidance of God. However, in the end, I always come to the same conclusion. I realize that I need God no matter what the situation or the sin, and that faith requires endurance, time, and patience. I’m someone who always needs to see the results now or I lose faith. I start to fall back into a zone of comfort or self-dependence, and refuse to fight or turn to the one who will take care of it all. Because of my impatience and lack of faith, I think I’ve failed to learn discipline and grow. That’s why this next passage is especially so important.

“Consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted. In your struggle against sin you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood.” … “It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline?” … “For they (our earthly fathers) disciplined us for a short time as it seemed best to them, but he disciplines us for our good, that we may share his holiness. For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.”

And so, although the discipline is always painful, and, at times, almost unbearable, it is done because God sees us as His children. He wants what is best for us so that we can SHARE in His holiness! I’m pretty sure that if someone refused to listen to me or obey me, I would NOT want them to share in my holiness… if I had any. This is the God that we are loved by and live for. He wants for us not only what is good, not only what is best, but, even greater, holiness. All this time, I’ve been seeking my own glory, my own way. Meanwhile, God wants us to be righteous, to be like Him. How blessed we are to be loved and ruled by someone who wants that for us even though we rebel and fail and sin and act a fool 365 days out of the year. Amen.

Leviticus 13:13

“Behold, if the leprosy have covered all his flesh, he shall pronounce him clean that hath the plague.”

Strange enough this regulation appears, yet there was wisdom in it, for the throwing out of the disease proved that the constitution was sound. This morning it may be well for us to see the typical teaching of so singular a rule. We, too, are lepers, and may read the law of the leper as applicable to ourselves. When a man sees himself to be altogether lost and ruined, covered all over with the defilement of sin, and no part free from pollution; when he disclaims all righteousness of his own, and pleads guilty before the Lord, then is he clean through the blood of Jesus, and the grace of God. Hidden, unfelt, unconfessed iniquity is the true leprosy, but when sin is seen and felt it has received its death blow, and the Lord looks with eyes of mercy upon the soul afflicted with it. Nothing is more deadly than self-righteousness, or more hopeful than contrition. We must confess that we are “nothing else but sin,” for no confession short of this will be the whole truth, and if the Holy Spirit be at work with us, convincing us of sin, there will be no difficulty about making such an acknowledgment—it will spring spontaneously from our lips. What comfort does the text afford to those under a deep sense of sin! Sin mourned and confessed, however black and foul, shall never shut a man out from the Lord Jesus. Whosoever cometh unto him, he will in no wise cast out. Though dishonest as the thief, though unchaste as the woman who was a sinner, though fierce as Saul of Tarsus, though cruel as Manasseh, though rebellious as the prodigal, the great heart of love will look upon the man who feels himself to have no soundness in him, and will pronounce him clean, when he trusts in Jesus crucified. Come to him, then, poor heavy-laden sinner,

Come needy, come guilty, come loathsome and bare;
You can’t come too filthy—come just as you are.

Back in the times of the Old Testament, lepers were cast out from society and considered defiled from birth. No one would touch them or dare go near them. To realize that we, because of sin, are considered the same as lepers, yet were saved and forgiven because of God’s love and Christ’s sacrifice, is a great hope that carries me from day to day. Some days I’m so disgusted by my sin and struggles that I can’t understand why or how God can love me. But He does–even when I don’t think it’s possible. So lepers, we are made clean in Christ’s blood, and all the physical and internal scars are gone in the truth and light of Jesus. How can we not be hopeful? How can we not be grateful for God and His covering of our leprosy?

2 Peter 1:4

So, at the suggestion of several people, “Morning and Evening” by Charles Spurgeon is the devotional I’ve decided to start! Of course, it took me a while to start it… because I’m so proactive.. but today’s entry for the morning was:

“Partakers of the divine nature.” – 2 Peter 1:4

“To be a partaker of the divine nature is not, of course, to become God. That cannot be. The essence of Deity is not to be participated in by the creature. Between the creature and the Creator there must ever be a gulf fixed in respect of essence; but as the first man Adam was made in the image of God, so we, by the renewal of the Holy Spirit, are in a yet diviner sense made in the image of the Most High, and are partakers of the divine nature. We are, by grace, made like God. “God is love”; we become love—”He that loveth is born of God.” God is truth; we become true, and we love that which is true: God is good, and He makes us good by His grace, so that we become the pure in heart who shall see God. Moreover, we become partakers of the divine nature in even a higher sense than this—in fact, in as lofty a sense as can be conceived, short of our being absolutely divine. Do we not become members of the body of the divine person of Christ? Yes, the same blood which flows in the head flows in the hand: and the same life which quickens Christ quickens His people, for “Ye are dead, and your life is hid with Christ in God.” Nay, as if this were not enough, we are married unto Christ. He hath betrothed us unto Himself in righteousness and in faithfulness, and he who is joined unto the Lord is one spirit. Oh! marvellous mystery! we look into it, but who shall understand it? One with Jesus—so one with Him that the branch is not more one with the vine than we are a part of the Lord, our Saviour, and our Redeemer! While we rejoice in this, let us remember that those who are made partakers of the divine nature will manifest their high and holy relationship in their intercourse with others, and make it evident by their daily walk and conversation that they have escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust. O for more divine holiness of life!”

This passage gives me hope because I remember that no matter how sinful or stupid I seem to be, that I was made in the image of God. The more I am filled with His Spirit and the more I become like Him, the more I love and walk in truth and live in joy. And not just any kind of love, truth, or joy, but that which comes from and is part of God. I can’t become perfect. I can’t become God. Living in a world filled with broken and imperfect people like myself, there are so many times when I can’t live on the hope and motivation of my own heart and mind to keep going on this path. Yet God reminds me why and how I can. Because He is God, and He is all that is good and perfect. I am not. Therefore, I need more of God in my life and in my character, actions, words, thoughts, everything. Amen.

Luke 24:1-12, Day 27

It’s the second to last day of my QT! OH NO! But not really ‘oh no!’ Today’s message was especially relevant. I’m especially excited today as well. So many people and events around me have been so encouraging, and I can’t help but think that this is a glimpse of the joy that God feels when His people turn to Him. It’s been a while since I’ve experienced, really tangibly FELT such real joy. Joy that results from truth and being immersed in and surrounded by it fully.

Today’s passage is about Christ’s resurrection from the tomb when Mary and others look to find that Jesus’ body is gone. Then they’re approached by angels who tell them that Christ has indeed come back to life! The guy who wrote the devotional says, “The tomb is where we rejoice, where we hope, where we run to tell others!”

Recently, there’s been a lot going on in my life or the lives of my friends. There’s been so much to rejoice and hope for, AND we’ve been telling others (maybe not so much the running part). It’s been a really uplifting time, but I was sobered by the fact that we seem to get so excited about our lives or just the good things/times. But do I run and joyfully share Christ with others? Even when I forget the truth in my own life? Do I have the same excitement and energy? I have to be honest, no. BUT, I’d like to. I want to share, shout (I’m good at that), and always be hopeful in the truth of the Gospel; of how it’s changed my life. And I hope that I, along with others, can really live this out. We all know how easy it is to just say the words or to think the thoughts, but to LIVE this joy and hope in our lives is the struggle.

I know today I’m really happy and excited, but the next day I’ll live like I don’t know the good news. Let’s not only remember but actively live this scene where Jesus is nowhere to be found in the tomb. I would like to constantly be running and sharing/living/shouting/telling/whispering/thinking the good news (well, not literally.. running… unless the situation calls for it).

Luke 23:27-31

It is finished. “The Crucifixion”:

“And there followed him a great multitude of the people and of women who were mourning and lamenting for him.²⁸But turning to them Jesus said, ‘Daughters of Jerusalem, do not weep for me, but weep for yourselves and for your children. ²⁹For behold, the days are coming when they will say, ‘Blessed are the barren and the wombs that never bore and the breasts that never nursed!’³⁰ Then they will begin to say to the mountains, ‘Fall on us,’ and to the hills, ‘Cover us.’³¹For if they do these things when the wood is green, what will happen when it is dry?”

I had to read these verses a couple of times to understand what Jesus was saying here. He’s going to the cross and telling the women and children not to weep for him but for themselves. And, he’s saying that there will come a day when people will say what’s mentioned above – whaaaa?

I think Jesus is saying that without him, without his crucifixion, people are pretty much living lives leading to sin and death. That we should really be crying for ourselves because our lives are to be pitied, not Christ’s. But, later on in this passage, Christ finishes what he has set out to do. No longer do we have to weep and live without hope, without a Savior. Especially now, in a society and time where you can never have too much, it seems like hope is in the things or people we have or will have or want to have. But no! We sin and want eternity or hope from things that are temporary and ephemeral when ‘the wood is green,’ so what happens when it’s dry? Will we then want death? Well, that kinda sucks.

But Jesus’ death and resurrection are never dry. I think that’s why people can find such hope from God’s word and His eternal presence. It’s never not green. It’s alive, all the time. Even when you don’t think it’s alive or even don’t WANT it to be alive. It’s alive all the time so too bad haha you can’t even escape the hope. That doesn’t suck. That’s actually quite awesome.  Because let’s face it, sometimes we want things to go badly in a masochistic way. We want pity. We want there to be no hope sometimes because then we have an excuse for things going horribly or people will give us some kind of credit for going through something so difficult all alone. But what kind of gratification can you really receive from that that would be beneficial or uplifting? It would just continue to bring you into a deeper, darker place of .. seriously nothing. Inescapable hope is… pretty amazing – even if it annoys you at times. And you didn’t do anything to deserve that hope so… even better. An inescapable hope that you don’t deserve. Hmm….. AWESOME!? THANK YOU!? I prefer that over darkness and desolation a bajillion times infinity!!!!

Luke 22:35

“And he said to them, ‘When I sent you out with no moneybag or knapsack, did you lack anything?’ They said, ‘Nothing.’ “

As some of you know, I’m preparing for a year of ministry in Japan. This summer has been extremely challenging because I’ve been faced with the worst parts of myself as I’m pretty much stuck at home and have urgent and pending responsibilities (and I’m not a big fan of responsibilities). Fundraising is not easy or meant to be, but someone with a personality like mine certainly could not ask for a bigger hurdle. However, I know that God’s calling and plan for me is not up to me. It’s not all on me, and I forgot (and continually forget) to be grateful for God’s victory and completion of all that He sets out to do.

That doesn’t mean I can’t or shouldn’t try my best and seek Him earnestly, which are other things that I’ve “forgotten” to do. Reading this verse in Luke gave me hope where I’ve been feeling insecure and, well, hopeless. If the disciples who had nothing went out and lacked nothing, then what do I have to worry about? And seeing as I’m very talkative but stuck at home, I felt like I had to share this somewhere or else it’d be like keeping a secret from everyone.. or I’d forget. So here’s proof. Thank God for the Internet.

(: